The evils of air and wisdom

There are times where I am so grateful to be an American born to intelligent and open-minded parents, raised to believe in reason and human decency, free from silly superstitions and crippling notions of class and identity.

One of the funnier superstitions that still drives me crazy but also makes me laugh is the belief shared by almost all of the guys from the Balkans that strong blowing wind is bad for you, especially if it cools you down. Ride in a car with a Bosnian and roll his window down and watch him squirm and beg for you to roll it up. They swear up and down that it screws up their muscles, that their necks won't work, or that their joints lock up and they get sick because of the air blowing across their skin. These guys would rather ride in a 120 degree sauna of a chopper with no moving air than have to deal with an open window, its friggin ridiculous.

Today I had 4 guys from Macedonia that flew out with us to a place near the Iranian border and we hadn't been in the air for 5 minutes before they were making these awful faces and furiously motioning to each other to try to get me to shut the window. I've been dealing with this all summer so I raised my hand up and indicated that the window would stay open. The guy nearest the window commenced with what we now call the Balkan shuffle. It consists of wildly exaggerated grimacing to indicate their discomfort and then if that doesn't elicit any sympathy they all start pretending to shiver and rub their arms and necks with pained expressions as if their muscles ache and they're freezing to death. All of this is done with them all looking straight at me so that I'll notice how uncomfortable they are. It doesn't matter if it's blazing hot outside and even hotter inside and I just loaded a ton of cargo by myself in 10 minutes and am completely soaked in sweat, all these guys can think about is getting the stupid window shut.

I used to tell the Bosnians and Macedonians that worked for me that I have driven for tens-of-thousands of miles all across both Europe and the U.S. and Iraq with the window down and I have never suffered ANY ill effects of this. They immediately cite an uncle or cousin who was crippled for life because they were foolish enough to try it. It's the same thing when I ask why they don't quit smoking if it's been proven to be bad for you. They all name some uncle or grandfather who lived to be 100 years old and smoked from the cradle to the grave or some similarly stupid lie. The men all swear that without drinking coffee every day that my heart will get weaker and my virility and ability to please a woman will suffer as a result. For some reason I seriously doubt that'll be a problem.

As stupid as it all sounds, these folks are dead serious about it, it's enough to drive me crazy sometimes.

I remember when I was a boy in Germany we used to roam for miles through the forests and countryside barefoot, it was wonderful! Some of the older German folks would take my mom aside and explain to her how neglectful she was being as a mother in letting us do that. Some of the German kids would call us "Ohne Shuhe Ami", it was a cultural thing and none of us understood it. It wasn't until I started reading accounts of how horrible things were for Germany after WWII that I began to understand why the old folks thought the way they did. Another German myth that a lot of folks believed was that you would get sick you drank water and ate an apple at the same time, or that bread hot out of the oven was poisonous.

Another very disturbing idea that I just can't understand is the Indian caste system. There are thousands of Indian subcontract workers here it is incredibly frustrating to have to deal with them and their cultural issues.

One of my friends here is from India, a very pretty and well educated girl who ran away to escape a forced marriage and ended up working for a NATO company here. One quiet evening as we sat and talked I asked her why all of the guys from her country that I see here are so clueless about everything. She started explaining to me about castes and how rigidly the system is enforced socially, basically most of the guys here are from the lower castes and are raised believing that this is what they are and that they will never be anything else. Theirs is a world of shame or even honor killings for attempting to improve one's lot in life beyond what is acceptable for their caste level. The result is a lot of guys who can't and have absolutely no desire to be able to manage anything but the most basic directions, even in their native languages, and who for the most part are hard-working but lack any initiative to do anything except that which is explicitly required of them. Of course there are plenty of brilliant Indians but for every one of them there is probably a thousand poor victims living in a world of enforced ignorance.

Ah well, enough of my ranting for the day...